Sing Like You Think No One's Listening

In my journey to be unashamed of my faith and for all of my answers to God's calling me into uncomfortable situations to grow me and use me, I'm seeking to live unhinged, joy-filled, untamed like the Lion Aslan. I mentioned before that I consecrated myself and He took it seriously. I prayed to dedicate myself. Now I pray to live in the present intentionally to listen to his call. He answers those prayers. He's the one who told us to ask, seek, and knock, but I don't think we always take him seriously.

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. - Matthew 7:7-8

One of my favorite songs from Straylight Run has this chorus and bridge:

Sing like you think no one's listening,

You would kill for this,

Just a little bit,

Just a little bit,

You would, you would... 

Sing me something soft,

Sad and delicate,

or loud and out of key,

Sing me anything,

we're glad for what we've got,

Done with what we've lost

Our whole lives laid out right in front of us...

Now this song has it's own meaning but for me lately it's all been about prayer and God's reaching out to us telling us how much He wants to hear from us. I know that everyone wishes they could live out who they truly are and not be afraid of judgement. We wish we could sing out loud, dance in public, express ourselves in our own way, dress, look, speak, act how we truly can and are. But, we succumb to self consciousness and worry about what others might think. We even worry about how God might think about us. Yet, He has His arms wide open ready to pour His love and graces into our lives.

To me He's asking us to give him anything, give him everything, the good, the bad, the ugly. It doesn't have to be pretty. Just like our singing when worship leaders say that if He gave you a terrible voice, give it right back to him in singing. St. Augustine said that singing is like praying twice. He wants us. He wants and will start healing us with anything, He just wants us to let Him in.

We like to talk about the mustard seed, the coin the old woman gives, the young boy that had only so much fish, but I don't think we believe it is good enough in reality. We want to be perfect first. We call people hypocrites who go to church and are liars, cheats, adulterers, addicts, sinners, yet that is exactly where they...we need to be. Jesus said He came for the sick. The Church is not a country club for people to come in and gloat about how they have everything together. It is a battlefield hospital for the wounded, confused, the lost, disgusting, the sinner.

Even now during worship I worry about who's watching. I get nervous about acting out my worship with my body, "Should I open my hands, how bout put my arms up". Honestly, sometimes I want to be throwing my arms and dreads around. Who cares what others think (well obviously I do). This is not for them, it's for God. But then I make it all about me and not God. In Bishop Fulton Sheen's book "The Seven Last Words" he recounts a story when Jesus appears to St. Jerome and asks him what he will give him:
Jerome answered, "I will give You my writings," to which Our Lord replied that it was not enough. "Then," said Jerome, "what shall I give You? My life of penance and mortification?" But the answer was, "Even that is not enough!" "What have I left to give you?" cried Jerome. Our Blessed Lord answered, "Jerome, you can give Me your sins." He tells Jerome to give Him the worst of him so that he can then be free, which is what he came and died for.

In those moments of life, or worship, of just being I'll try, and I encourage you, to sing like no one is listening or watching, although, He is. I mean it's for Him anyway, right?